Thursday, July 19, 2007

Prayer Request Update

Thank you all for your comments I appreciate them and I agree with you all. Loving people does not stop with a change of an appointment. Correct etiquette in dealing with this situation does effect it though and my DS was very helpful in this fact.

Before I get to that though left me give you an update on the situation. It seems that the treatments are working and he is responding well to them. He can still communicate by squeezing hands and wiggling toes. This means that the brain is still firing which is always a good sign. There is simply a very long road ahead of him and his family and they aren't out of the woods yet.

Now when I talked with my DS this is what he said. He first off conveyed his sorrow for the situation, which was a good pastoral move because I felt taken care of all of a sudden. He then listen as I explained the situation (I have been impressed by him thus far). Once I finished he explained that there is nothing wrong with going to visit the hospital or the family. The only key is to give the new pastor a heads up. He said that the new minister should understand and wouldn't see any reason why he would object. I reassured the DS that I don't want to step on the new minister's toes and he said a simple phone call to give him a heads up is all I would need to do.

I then went on to inquire further into the hypothetical for information but also to understand what to do if this situation went down hill fast. I asked him how should I handle a funeral situation if the family wants me to participate in it? This is where the protocol is very important. His answer was that the minister there would need to contact me and invite me, in written form. If I talk to the family and they ask I should direct them to have the minister talk to me and invite me. This has to do with respecting turf. If I would agree without going through the minister I would be encroaching on his appointment. If I did this to the extreme I could be brought up on charges of undermining the ministry of this pastor.

That is what the DS conveyed to me and I added some of my understanding as well. Overall I have the right to be able to convey my love and sorrow to this family during this time. I do need to be respectful of the new minister and the present senior minister and let them know what I am doing so I do not look suspicious or that I am undermining them.

If anyone has heard of anything else that I have left out I would love to hear. Thanks.


seethroughfaith said...

I'd also add that it's good if you can help them in understanding that their new minister is also there for them :) At the end of the day they do live on his turf and he's their shepherd totally submitted to The Shepherd of course and over the months they need to build up a good relationship with him and others in the church too. It's all about relationships.

your DS sounds super by the way. Blessings to him/her too on pastoring you as well as giving sound advice.

seethroughfaith said...

I used him (but of course the new pastor may be a woman too) I'm not sure if you said in your original post - but it's easy to fall down the male only pastor route - so I apologise if I got this wrong.